People often say ‘You just have to accept it’. But how do you do that? Accepting something that you don’t want to accept. Letting go of something that you want to hang on to, and constantly thinking about ways to make sure things stay the same.
The following tools help to change resistance into acceptance:
You can’t control everything in life. Let go of the feeling that you should be happy all the time. Life is unfair sometimes. Feelings of resistance are also allowed to be there.
Fighting takes up a lot of energy and doesn’t solve the problem. It helps to slow down and give yourself some space, instead of trying to change things which you don’t have any impact on.
You can’t push away feelings of anger or sadness, and you don’t have to either. Go through these feelings, even though this is difficult. And don’t be too hard on yourself.
Allowing yourself to be sad, frustrated or feel pain also gives you space to look at all the available possibilities. Focus on everything which is still possible, instead of hanging on to the past.
Acceptance doesn’t mean you agree with what’s happening, or that your problem or feelings are no longer there. But it doesn’t have to determine your entire life. Acceptance lives inside you, and you take it with you. Into a new life, with the children, in a new house and maybe in the future with a new partner as well.
Patricia is there for you, to answer all your questions on divorce and mediation. You can ask all your questions on your specific situation and Vixx Divorce Coaching during a non-binding (online) meeting.Get in touch with Patricia